Top 10 Ways to Protect Yourself BEFORE You File for Divorce

 

The following information is general in nature and is not intended for the purpose of providing individualized legal advice.  As with any legal matter, you should consult with a lawyer about the facts and circumstances of your unique case.

 

TOP 10 WAY TO PROTECT YOURSELF BEFORE YOU FILE FOR DIVORCE

 

Often the best approach before starting a divorce case is to sit down and have a frank and honest discussion with your spouse.  If there are open lines of communication, consider mediation first. 

 

However, if the lines of communication between you and your spouse are closed, you should consider the following measures to protect yourself, you children, and your assets: 

 

1. Talk to a lawyer now - not later.  Take advantage of an initial consultation with a good divorce lawyer.  Do this before you make a move that you may later regret.  A good divorce lawyer will review your goals and will candidly assess the strengths and weaknesses of your case.

2. Don’t sign anything.  Often a dominant spouse will attempt to force an agreement on the other spouse.  Even informal written agreements may result in negative legal consequences to you.  Talk to a good divorce lawyer before you sign anything. 

3. First things first - protect the physical safety of you and your children.  Emergency court orders can quickly be put in place that protect you and your children from an abusive spouse.  (This is usually done through an emergency ex-parte order for protection).  However, in extreme cases, a court order by itself may not provide adequate protection.  In these cases your first priority may be to enter a secure domestic violence emergency shelter.

4. Don’t get “set up” for a domestic violence charge.  Unfortunately, sometimes people with no history of violence, end their marriage with a slap, push or grab.   These actions are all grounds for a misdemeanor assault charge - and will have an extremely negative effect in your divorce.  If your spouse is trying to set you up for a domestic violence charge, get away from the situation and immediately hire a lawyer.

5. If custody of your children is an issue – do not move out and leave the children with your spouse.   In most cases a judge will try to keep the status quo in place for children at the start of a divorce case.   If you have moved out the family home and left the children with your spouse, the judge will assume you made a good decision and leave your children with your spouse.  If for whatever reason you are forced to move out and leave the children with your spouse, immediately hire a good divorce lawyer -the same day if possible!  Each day that your children are not living with you, works against any claim you may have regarding primary custody.  

6. Cancel joint credit cards. Your spouse may run up huge credit card bills in the weeks just prior to one of you filing for divorce.  Cancel and close joint credit cards.  At a minimum make sure that no new charges can be made on any joint credit cards. 

7. Have one credit card that is in just your name.  The initial stages of a divorce can be very expensive.  Having, a credit card solely in your name provides you with the means to pay for any unforeseen extra expenses.  

8. Protect your financial records.  Make copies of tax returns, pay stubs, employment contracts, retirement account information, deeds, titles, loan applications, credit card statements, bank/savings account statements, and other such records.  If possible get three to five years of these records.  Keep your copies of these records in a safe location away from the family home. 

9. Protect your interest in cash accounts.  You may have joint checking and savings accounts with large cash balances.  (Balances in excess of any uncleared checks that have been written).  In order to protect your interest in these accounts consider putting half of any cash balances into an account that is solely in your name and to which only you have access.

10. Get a temporary order put in place now.    There is simply no substitute to a temporary order when it comes to protecting your rights.  A temporary order will restrain the sale of property, require insurance policies to be maintained, set child support, put in place a parenting plan, award spousal maintenance, and set up other temporary rules of the game.  The only way to get a temporary order is to first file a Petition for Dissolution.